HEY HEY GUYS!

So I'm writing to y'all this week by starting with an apology because I haven't written in a long time. Things are going well here at school. I feel older and more in control of things this semester. Maybe it's because all the girls in my ward are 18 years old, or because I have a "real job" while at school, or maybe because I feel like I have more life experiences now. I am so grateful for the life I have lived. We have a great family and I have great siblings and amazing parents. Looking back on everything that life has brought me, I realize I wouldn't change anything! I would change a few things that I have done or choices I've made, but lately I've seen how my decisions have taken me to where I am now. I am responsible for what has happened to me and can't blame any person or experience for anything negative in my life. I feel like I see life better as I get older and have more experiences. I look back and see how I learned a lot this last summer. I feel like an expert on certain subjects. When I give my opinion, people seem to listen more here at school. It's help my confidence because I feel more mature, professional and smarter. I am seeing how things I've learned at school can be used in other classes and in life. I feel so much better about where I'm going and feel I've been intrigued to learn more and get more involved. I love it when I feel challenged, but even better is when I feel that I can be original and go where I've never been before. I have felt that more lately. 

I just want you all to know that I love you and am so Grateful for everything that you all do. I hope you all have a wonderful week. 

Love, Neil

Change in life is constant

These past two weeks my heart has been full of the emotion of how life is constantly changing. I so enjoyed having everyone home for over a week, except the Steve and Jeremy who only got two days, and seeing how they have all changed and grown. Of course the wonderful, fun, grandchildren are always changing but everyone else grows also. I couldn't be happier as a mother to see their growth but I don't like the change of them living away and I not get to see their growth all the time. Time is a crazy thing and I wish I could control it more, especially when they are all here. I wish I could spend time only how I wish instead of having to do responsibilities also. Such is my life though. I don't know what I'd change to change that.
The other change of sending Dean off. Going to the MTC couldn't get any better for a mother on one hand because you wouldn't want them any other place then there at that time. Yet on the other hand, your heart aches to walk away from them and not get to hear their voice for so long. I am so proud of him though and once again, wouldn't change that.
But the change this week of hearing my sister Shirley has terminal cancer is a new change my heart is having a hard time with. As hard of a time as I am having, I can't comprehend her emotions of the biggest change of all in leaving this earth life. We all will get our turn and once again, don't get to choose how that change happens, when or where. It just comes. She is doing it with grace, love and laughter so far and I love her for trying so hard. I've been through the change with my mom and dad going, but this will be different. Once again, I get to learn how to be grateful for the change because all I can do is change my heart not the situation.
I love you all, Margaret or MOM